Trip to a Fancy Chinese Restaurant

This week was my dear friend Zhao’s 51st (or 52nd, depending on how Chinese she was being when she told me how old she was when we met), and she let me come along to lunch with her mother and her son on her birthday to a very nice Chinese restaurant in Nankai. It was called Taiwan Restaurant. I took some pictures of the menu so you could get as much amusement out of it as I did.

This was the text under every new menu title throughout the book. I love the default text you see everywhere here in China (on cars, t-shirts (“YOUR IMAG HERE”), stationery, and now menus).


Perfect for those muggy summer days.

The picture is blurry, but it says “Yang Head Infiltration.” I don’t know what it is.

“Grabbing Power and Money” and its story that you can’t read (and even if you could, wouldn’t quite understand the Chinglish).

This is called “Hopeful.” Does it mean the shrimp in the glass thought they’d escape the fate of the shrimp on the plate?

That just whets your appetite, doesn’t it?

More default text for your viewing pleasure.

I laughed out loud when I saw this at the restaurant.

I looked it up and Salmeterol is a drug used for asthma.

I am proud to say I tasted the Grandma fish.

Look, they made an exciting story!

This is a little harder to figure out.

I wish I had the faintest idea how they came up with some of these translations.

You want some right now, don’t you?

“Desktop” appeared many times throughout the menu.

This isn’t as hard to understand as some things.

This also made me laugh out loud.

And again…

Why does the word “streaky” make me giggle?

Uh Oh

Strangest baby food I’ve ever seen.

Just makes you want to pick the whole thing up and take a big bite.

More of that delicious bacteria.

No knock-offs for them.

I hear pineapple oil is the new meth.

This was pretty unappetizing. Melted purple ice cream inside.

This is Taiwanese milk bread, like a really delicious almost-donut.

Also super yummy, pork ribs in a sweet almost barbecue-y sauce.

Zhao’s mother, her son, and Zhao herself. All the food we ate was actually really amazing (except for the Grandma Fish, but fish isn’t my thing).


One comment

  1. Those are really funny! You should submit them to the website.

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